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Month: May 2015

Keeping vanilla at bay

Keeping vanilla at bay

My life is quickly becoming the busiest it has ever been. As much as it pains me to admit this,  sometimes it’s difficult to keep on top of everything. I’m in the middle of a big transition in my career as well as in my personal life. As always, my kittyslave keeps me grounded and (somewhat!) sane, and for that I’m very, very grateful. Thankfully, this is only a short-term issue and I will soon be able to go back to normal.

I like to use sex and orgasms as stress relievers, which makes it somewhat more difficult to keep Mr Kitty in his place. After all, you can’t expect a man to feel like he’s given control to his other half when she keeps asking for sex! I know he could never see me in the same was as he saw previous girlfriends because chastity has been such a fundamental part of our relationship. At the same time, I like to help him remember that within our game his duty is, before anything else, to serve and worship me.

Regardless of how busy we may be, there are some routines that we follow religiously. Their purpose isn’t simply to keep us from getting bored. With the exception of chastity and all it entails, we’re a fairly independent couple with a strong emotional connection, but also a strong need to have our own personal space. Having a slightly structured approach to our relationship during busier times really helps in preventing us from not spending enough time together.


Some of these things I’ve mentioned before on the blog, but I prefer to have them all in the one place:

Bedtime: Mr Kitty always gets into bed with me before I’m ready to fall asleep. This gives us the perfect chance to talk about any worries or issues we might need to share, as well as leaving plenty of scope for spontaneous sexy time. While that’s the end of the day for me, for him it’s usually the beginning of his work ‘day’, so once I’m ready to sleep, he leaves the bedroom and starts work.

Tea: he provides me with a cup of tea in the morning when I wake up (end of workday for him) and when I get home from work. It makes all the difference.

Girl worship: I have quite a high sex drive. If I’m horny, he’ll nearly always be around to help me get off. It’s not a specific requirement (unless I give the order) but it’s nice!

Evening time together: we spend a couple of hours every evening where we usually watch something together. Sometimes it’s a movie, sometimes we just watch TV series. We take a lot of cuddling breaks and on some occasions we end up not watching anything at all, just spending time together enjoying each other’s company. Wine is usually a feature. 😉

Daily chastity checks: just to verify that he’s still locked up. I know that he’s very skilled in picking locks and despite our system, I want him to know that I do care that he’s locked up! Plus I get to tease him while I check that everything is fine. =]

Loving gropes: I love love love to grope my slave. Not in a lecherous old man kind of way, more in a horny girl who likes owning things way. I like how squishy his ass feels in my little hands and how uber soft the skin on his balls is. <3

Visible tools of discipline: my favourite paddle is, of course, still hanging secure on its butt plug. I like to have a few items of that sort visibly lying around the house, so he remembers to be good. You don’t want to visit our house unannounced.


So despite our currently hectic life, it’s really not too bad. A lot of those things naturally steer us towards fun times and prevents getting dangerously close to a completely vanilla relationship, which we wouldn’t find fulfilling — or worse, a dead bedroom situation.

Positive reinforcement

Positive reinforcement

I was very nice to Mr Kitty these past few days because he was lovely and well-behaved. I thought he might need a break from being in his metal cage, so I let him stay unlocked. This also allowed me to inspect the cage properly, to make sure that no other material issues will crop up.

Of course, I didn’t allow him to orgasm. He could wank as much as he wanted, but not orgasm. I wouldn’t call it edging because, despite my teasing, a lot of the pleasuring was done primarily by him with a little of my help. It made his sex drive go crazy! Now that he’s back in his cage, I feel like he might explode it through sheer internal pressure. Thankfully, a little cock is no match for cold, hard steel. 😉

Speaking of cages…

In this other post I mentioned that I like to use an online randomiser to get codes for the safe. Heh, sometimes there are pitfalls with this method! For example, my kittyslave had to reject the latest code I gave him because he realised that he’d remember it a little too easily. It was 19834561. 1983, his year of birth, 3456… 1. Seriously, sometimes random is so memorable. For those analytically minded, the randomiser website has an explanation for randomness not looking quite that random.

In other news, I seem to have taken up control of another cock by chance. I don’t know for how long as it’s more of an online friendship, but I suppose I will do it for as long as it’s fun. I’m realising that thinking about controlling other cocks gives me a weird, lighter version of a power trip. It’s pretty cool. If my job didn’t take up as much time as it does, I would seriously consider building myself a little army of locked up boys…

As I typed that, a very cute naked Mr Kitty came to me and asked, in the most adorable way ever, “can I be fucked tonight? Pwease?”. I’m too tired to say yes, and I didn’t want him thinking that I’d do it just because he wants to… so I put a butt plug in him instead. That’ll do — until tomorrow at least. Then he might regret having asked.


Numbing cream, sex and orgasm denial

Numbing cream, sex and orgasm denial

Wine has weird effect on me. After a couple of sips, I start getting this faint physical feeling of arousal. If I continue to drink it, I actually get really horny. The effect tapers off after the first glass or two, probably because after two glasses I start to become tipsy (I know I know, I’m a lightweight). I suspect that this effect is caused by one of my fun guy friends, who used to have sex with me every once in a while until I moved here. Like a good Russian, he liked his drink. And like a good host, he knew that my drink of choice would be wine, so that’s what he served every time. I think I subconsciously associate wine with sex; in particular, very good sex.

Mr Kitty and I have a glass of wine with our dinner most days. I’ve learnt to ignore its arousing effect unless the situation calls for it. Mr Kitty, however, has also learnt to take advantage of it for his own purposes. He will sometimes start caressing me gently as we watch a film or a tv series. At first, I don’t usually notice what’s happening… all I know is that I’m getting a little hornier. The end result is often that he’s forced to pleasure me, but still doesn’t get unlocked.

Last night we had one such situation, except I unlocked him. I really needed cock but I had no need for being filled with cum this time, and I definitely didn’t want my slave to orgasm. Luckily, there’s more than one way to maintain orgasm denial. ;P

Enter the lidocaine cream. For those who don’t know, lidocaine is a commonly used local anaesthetic, generally used topically for relief from pain and itching. Apply it to a penis, and the feeling will vary from slight numbness (as in premature ejaculation treatments), to complete loss of sensation, depending on the strength.

In our case, we used enough 5% lidocaine cream that he could feel his cock very faintly, but not enough to feel any pleasure at all. In his own words: “It feels like I’m using a strap on”. To keep the hard on without the pleasure, he also took some Viagra.

I was very tired so all I needed was a quick fuck and then sleep. And yet, somehow, the sex turned out to be amazing.

I first made him go down on me, to allow the Viagra enough time to kick in. I’ve said it before, but I’m so proud of Mr Kitty’s skills. I made him go on for a while until I was just about to orgasm, and then I made him stop. It was time for a good fuck.

We used a condom in case any of the cream hadn’t absorbed properly, so that it wouldn’t make me numb like him. He didn’t have any way of knowing how deep he was going other than by watching my reaction. Result: very hard, deep fucking. I liked that. Because of the tongue service, my first orgasm happened very quickly, and it was really intense.

I then made him go down on me again… because I could. Again, I got close enough to orgasm but decided to move onto using my fingers, while he sucked on my boobs and caressed me everywhere. I love it when he does that. Then something strange happened, which has been happening more often in recent times. I had this weird, drawn out, extremely intense succession of orgasms, where I thought it was over and then I’d get another one. I don’t even know how many I had. It was unbelievable. I was so wet by the end of it that he might as well have cum in me. My mouth was dry and I was exhausted but perfectly relaxed. My lovely slave brought me water, as he knows to do after great sex.

“Time to get locked up.”

Of course, that was wishful thinking, as I knew that with the Viagra it would take him a long time to shrink enough to get back into his cage. Luckily, the numbing cream would prevent him from trying to wank, and he knows better than to do that anyway.


Prince Albert piercing, mmm

Prince Albert piercing, mmm

In reply to a comment I got today:

How did you convince him to get a PA when his previous SO wasn’t able to do so? More depth around his objections and eventual acceptance would be interesting. Where was it done, what was the experience like, did he complain of the pain or aftercare, how has it changed the fit of the device… These are all questions for which the answers I wouldn’t mind reading on your blog.

I was planning on writing about it at some stage, but today is as good a time as any!


The idea of getting a Prince Albert piercing came to us by accident. About a month into our relationship, I asked Mr Kitty a little more about the two foreskin piercings that he had on either side of his cock. I wanted to know how they worked within chastity, whether it hurt to get them done, how did he feel about them, etc. To him, they weren’t a big deal because they were very small, and the foreskin is so thin that piercing it wasn’t particularly painful. So I asked if he’d ever get “one of those proper piercings, those that go through your cock and hurt loaaads to get!!!” He squirmed, thought about it for a moment, and said no.

At the time, I was an 18 year old girl who had seen several naked guys, but none that were pierced. The idea of putting a sharp piece of metal through the most sensitive part of Mr Kitty’s body was fascinating, but so incredible that I considered it unthinkable. At least as a serious idea…

Regardless, I went ahead and said:

“I bet you’ll get one if I make you do it.”

His facial expression changed to a mixture of surprise, excitement, and a hint of fear. It was the first time that I felt like I had real power over him. Our relationship was still very young, and we were at the very beginning of our journey into chastity. I wasn’t yet sure of what I could achieve through it. His response indicated that he was loving the suggestion that I could order him to do such a seemingly drastic body modification.

Over the next couple of months, I went from joking about it to fully expecting him to do it. The transition was completely seamless, both for me and for him. We didn’t even realise that it had become a serious plan. It wasn’t about chastity device security — we were far too inexperienced to really think about that yet — it was about ownership. He would get a Prince Albert piercing because I made him get a Prince Albert piercing. He’d think of me when the pain pierced his cock, and every time he’d see the piercing thereafter, he would feel owned by me.

One day I told him that I wanted him to book the appointment at a piercing place of his choice. A few days later he sent me a very loving text, explaining how he was about to go into the piercing studio, how nervous he was, how scared of the pain he was, but that it would be worth it if it was what I wanted. I was sitting with my girl friends during lunchtime at school, and of course I had to read it out to them. They were impressed at his resolve, and so was I.

By the end of the day, he had sent me pictures of his very bloody cock right after the procedure, saying that it was nowhere nearly as painful as he thought it would be. It looked horrific!

The piercing was done very professionally, more like a medical procedure. Mr Kitty thought that he might feel self conscious when he got it done, but the piercer’s skill made it obvious that he had done this procedure many, many times before. It was over quickly and now all he needed to do was wait for it to heal.

Aftercare and healing

I’m very fuzzy on the details and timeline of healing, as it’s been a while! If I remember correctly, he was told to not masturbate or have sex for at least two weeks, but that it would take a month or two for the area to be fully healed. He was to keep the area clean and avoid tight clothing. That’s all I remember as far as aftercare.

We went back to having sex as soon as he felt able… and discovered that the pierced area needed ‘tempering’, since the healed tissue was still too recent to have any strength. For the first couple of months, we had to be more careful than usual, and often needed to stop sex earlier because he would start to get little twinges of internal pain. This eventually went away.

At this point I should say that the pain was possibly exacerbated by my over-enthusiasm in sex. I think every girl should try being fucked by an unpierced cock first, and then again by the same cock, post piercing. It was so good. In fact, I raved enough about it that a few of my guy friends ended up getting their own PAs and thanking me for it!

Chastity device security

Once the PA had healed completely, Mr Kitty was back to being locked up most of the time. We decided to get a new cage, which turned into one of our favourites: the Steelworxx Steelheart. With the PA attachment, there was no way he could ever pull out of the device, as I knew he could do with the CB-6000 that he previously used (it was even easier in the shower, due to the soapy water!). The extra security definitely brought a new dimension to our chastity play. Essentially, it felt more real. And knowing that I could convince him to get his most precious bit of his body pierced through with a chunk of metal, just by ordering him to do so, made me very happy.

Getting the Prince Albert had many advantages and no disadvantages at all. It was quicker than expected, the healing process wasn’t too bad, the sex went from good to amazing, and it made me feel like a powerful motherfucker. After all this time, I still think every man should get one. =P

Keys, tags and safe codes

Keys, tags and safe codes

When it comes to male chastity, I’m a lazy keyholder. I want the experience to be as effortless as possible. Being very absent-minded and prone to losing things, I knew that asking me to keep the key to Mr Kitty’s cock was asking for trouble. Neither of us wanted to deal with the possibility of ending up in A&E, with a doctor using power tools on his sensitive bits! So we needed a system that required little effort on my part and where I didn’t need to know where the key is at all times.

The solution we’ve come up with is a hybrid system that uses safe codes and tags, depending on our needs at any particular time.

We keep one of the keys for the device in a safe with an electronic code lock. I set the code, of course. When Mr Kitty is allowed to get unlocked, I tell him the digits as he keys them in, so that he can’t write them down somewhere. To prevent him from learning the code off, I change it periodically. Most times, I just get an 8-digit number from

If I’m away and kittyslave needs to be unlocked, I sometimes just send him an SMS text with the code. He’s required to delete the text right after use. The only issue is that while I trust him, I don’t trust his horniness! So this method of code delivery is only ever used for medical reasons or when I’m allowing him to stay unlocked for a few days. For example, I often let him stay unlocked when he goes on business trips, to save on hassle at the airport. These trips happen a few times a year, but the most they ever take is two days. Since I know that he’ll be way too busy to even think about anything sexual, I don’t mind unlocking him. When he’s back, there’s a fresh safe code and a metal cage waiting for him. =]

The other key to the chastity device is kept by me. I like to keep it in my handbag, since I use the same handbag most days, and therefore the key is always with me. Mr Kitty had the idea of putting the key inside the holder of a True Utility MiniDriver (a keyring screwdriver set. Very handy!). We add a tagged cable tie to the holder, in such a way that the tie must be cut before the key can be taken out.

This way, when Mr Kitty gets unlocked, he must always remove the tag. On locking up, he adds a new tag and takes a picture showing both his locked up cock, and the tagged key. The tag eliminates the risk of him using the key while I’m asleep, for example.


We’ve been using this system for a long time now, and it’s never given us any issues. We arrived at it through trial and error. I suspect that’s how most couples get to their own systems. I hope this information helps someone to get to their perfect setup a little quicker!

Got bored. Drew a picture.

Got bored. Drew a picture.

This is what happens when I get bored, find a pencil, start a random sketch of an ass, and then realise that I have no eraser.

Considering the lack of references used (and therefore the terrible anatomy) I know I’m going to regret posting it here. But hey, I like ass. I’m an ass person with nothing to lose.

So here goes!


On the importance of male chastity

On the importance of male chastity

Mr Kitty didn’t feel great on Sunday. The way he put it, he was feeling “a bit meh”. It made me worried because if he couldn’t pinpoint what was wrong, I couldn’t help him fix it. So I thought the best thing I could do was give him some space and let him deal with it, while letting him know that I was still here if he needed me.

Then he asked to be unlocked.

This wasn’t the usual begging, but a very calm argument for why he deserved to be unlocked… because he was horny. (!) Naturally, I wasn’t going to unlock him just so that he could wank, so I ordered him to milk himself fully, and he complied.

Later in the day, he asked again to be unlocked, this time to shave properly. Since he’d milked, I knew it was unlikely that he’d wank. I made him promise that he wouldn’t try anything, and allowed him to get unlocked for shaving. Somehow we ended up talking about why he’d asked twice in one day. He said that he was feeling a bit down that day, and he really wanted to put on some comfy clothes and not have to wear a cage on his cock.

I was taken aback by this. I don’t know why, but it really seemed to have an effect on me. The idea that he didn’t want to wear a chastity device because of a slightly low mood was like a softer version of me not wanting to wear my engagement ring for a similar reason. I told him that. He looked at me, and smiled.

I’d never realised before how much it means to me to control his orgasms, or how much more it means to him that I care about it.

When Mr Kitty got unlocked, we noticed something unexpected: his cage appears to be experiencing some slight superficial corrosion on the bottom. Nothing to worry about, but he’s filed it away for now and I will be keeping an eye on it. Despite being made of 316L grade steel (a low carbon austenitic steel), which has a higher resistance to corrosion in high chloride environments, the surface finish isn’t great. Thing is, considering the environment that a chastity device is used, whether it’s made of 304 steel (your standard stainless steel) or 316/316L is mostly irrelevant unless trips to the beach while locked up are a very frequent occurrence. Surface finish is very relevant. It makes me wonder about the manufacturing processes used by chastity device vendors.

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